DAVAO, The Philippines — “Bye-bye America!” said Pres. Rodrigo Duterte in rage upon receiving the news that the United States decided to scrap the aid package to the Philippines.
In 2011, the US aid agency Millennium Challenge Corporation (MCC) released $434 million to fund the country’s poverty reduction programs. Recently, the American aid agency held back the funding of Duterte’s extrajudicial execution of drug addicts that menaced society program.
“You know we have 4 million drug addicts in my country — that’s a whopping 1 million increase in less than 6 months. When I came to office and started exterminating them, they were only 3 million. There’s a process called evolution and mutation,” the president said.
“Now, without the money from the US, it will be hard for me to hit my target of 100,000 dead bodies floating in Manila Bay by the end of the year. With the American dollars, I could pay my vigilante hitmen as much as $1,000 per kill,” he added.
“But for now I have to do it myself maybe one, two three … I’m saying… they’re all dead. God, forgive me for killing these idiots. You create a human monster so if you are God, why do you have to create these idiots? That’s why they die,” the president said prayerfully.
The Americans earlier condemned Duterte’s method of killing, saying it was barbaric to kill with a handgun. Pres. Barack Obama advised Duterte to use drones in his missions. Some well-meaning Republicans suggested napalm, just like in Vietnam. These have been the methods the US preferred in ridding the country of drug addicts.
Pres. Duterte, however, refused to heed the advice of the Americans. He used the vigilantes instead and provided them stable jobs in government.
“I understand that we have been stricken out of the Millennium Challenge. Well, good, I welcome it. We can survive without American money. But you know, America, you might also be put to notice. Prepare to leave the Philippines, prepare for the eventual repeal or the abrogation of the Visiting Forces Agreement.”
“You know, tit for tat … if you can do this, so (can) we. It ain’t a one-way traffic. Bye-bye America,” Duterte taunted.
Duterte called the Americans and the Europeans hypocrite sons of whores, and he offered himself and his country’s interests to China and Russia. Duterte’s grandparents were Chinese, which explained his closeness to China. Vladimir Putin has been his crush since the Russian’s rise to power.
“They do not insult people, they do not interfere,” the president said about Putin and Russia.
Of course, Russia just interfered with the US elections in November to help Donald Trump win the presidency.
“Russia and China are helping me in my campaign against drug addicts. They encouraged me and supported my efforts. But I am forgiving. Once my good friend Donald Trump assumes office in January, I’m pretty sure he will release the money that I badly needed,” the hopeful Duterte said.
“I have talked to Trump, he was very nice, very courteous. I could not sense any hostile drift or even the manner he was saying it, so, in deference, I’ll just wait. I will let Obama fade away and if he disappears, then I will begin to reassess.”
“And you know, people with the same feather flock together,” Duterte said.